Abiding in Him

“I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” John 15:5

Yesterday I had a twenty-minute sweet and exciting conversation with a woman who could be a friend one day. She doesn’t fit into my usual circle of women who look like me. When I first saw her a week ago, I selfishly prayed, “Lord, no, no, no… I don’t want to go there!”

You see, during this year of fear and pestilence, God has had me treading water in mighty waves of silence. I thought he had me on a sure path in one direction, but He has been preparing my mind and my heart to swim in unfamiliar waters to a different shore. 

I am reminded of when Jesus’s storm-tossed boat landed on the shores of the Gerasenes. His greeting party was a demon-possessed man whose violence could not be contained by metal shackles or chains. Naked and tormented, he cut his skin with stones and roamed among the grave tombs crying out night and day. (Mark 5:1-15) Jesus had a way of showing up to have conversations with the most unlikely people.

And you know what I am wondering, don’t you? Is he expecting me to do the same?

A week ago, I listened to the impromptu one-sentence testimonies of women from an addiction program who were attending a retreat our church was hosting. Their words were beautiful and encouraging and heartbreaking and painfully real. And you know the Holy Spirit – how he makes your heart beat faster and your hands sweat and pushes you forward into places you don’t really want to go? Well, at the end of the program, I found myself over at the table where those women were sitting, asking the woman who ministers to them with God’s words if I could come and hang out. She graciously said, “Yes.” And as we were exchanging information, a woman across the table looked at me with a street-worn face. And smiled a toothless smile.

That face had haunted me and terrified me as I planned on attending their meeting on Friday. “Oh Lord, I can’t do it,” I lamented. My reasoning to keep me moving forward was, “Oh, I will just be teaching these women… I won’t have to get involved with them!” I prayed for God to soften my hard judgmental heart; to give me willing hands to serve. There, that should fix that, I thought. I am just going to support the ministry. Just going to sit and observe. I can do that.

The room was filled with more women than I expected. Maybe somewhere between 50 and 60, spread out in separate comfortable chairs, most dressed in athletic wear since they had just participated in a Zumba class. I was directed to an office chair, off to the side near the front. The bible teaching was perfect and simple with practical examples, scripture memorization, and whole-room discussion. The woman sitting closest to me, slightly behind me, raised her hand to share a thought, and as I turned to listen, I had to laugh to myself; “Of course, God, in a full room you would place that woman with the toothless grin right next to me.” God never misses a chance to correct my thinking in the most amusing, in-your-face kind of way! I am convinced God has an incredible sense of humor.

Sure enough, as soon as class ended, there she was with a compliment and a question, “I like your skirt! Where did you get it?” And we were off and running.

We shared connections of mothers who sewed, similar opinions about the state of the world (this woman did not mess around with small talk), the power of personal testimonies, and she showed me specific notes she had taken from the talk. What we did not have in common was her lifelong addiction to alcohol and meth and a drug-dealing, scripture-quoting boyfriend of 14 years who was a porn addict and had become abusive. I realized as we talked, she was probably as addicted to him as she was to alcohol.

“You know,” I shared, as the conversation once again was sprinkled with more stories of her “once wanted to be a preacher” boyfriend who had a history of rescuing her from rehab and swinging by the liquor store on their way home, “When Jesus was tempted in the wilderness, the devil quoted scripture too.” A look of sudden recognition crossed her face as she grabbed my arm, “That is what he is! He is the devil! I never realized it!”

As our conversation continued with thoughts about the power we give others over our lives and finding our worth in God, I began to notice how much she looked like a good friend of mine – if my friend had been a meth addict. The same dancing blue eyes, brunette hair cropped short, affectionate touch, intelligent mind. 

“I love talking with you,” she confided, as we began to end our conversation. “This is a better high than what I get with alcohol.” I shared with her it was Spirit meeting Spirit – God within us, connecting us to each other through Him.

The teaching from Friday had concentrated on abiding in The Vine; branches remaining in Him would produce much fruit – apart from Him they could do nothing. Today as I read deeper into the passage, the words of Jesus speak knowingly to me: 

“As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Abide in my love. These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full. This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you.” John 15:9,11-12

Aha! This is the reason we say we know a living God, whose Word is alive and active. Today, back in my pleasant neighborhood, with the sounds of child’s play and bird’s song, God takes me deeper into His Word, reminding me of my initial very human abhorrence of a woman so unlike me. Filtered through His love and His Spirit, I experienced His joy while talking about intimate and deep things with this woman. The kinds of things you would talk with a dear friend about.

Whenever I think I am going to share God’s wisdom with others, I end up being the one who needs the wisdom and who sees God anew! I love this precious abiding of God in me.

Last night I fell asleep praying for this newly introduced friend. I woke up with her on my heart. Perhaps she will be there when I return on Tuesday. Perhaps she will have torn up the letter she has written her boyfriend asking him to come to get her. Perhaps I can get to know her better. Perhaps.

One of the questions that was asked on Friday: “Has anyone experienced the character of God? What did that look like?” 

I wrote down the answers that were called out: “Peace of mind and patience.” “Provision of other beautiful women to walk beside me.” “Protection from my own ill will and the enemy.” And the answer from my new friend, “A way out of self-destruction, a safe place.”

My answer today to experiencing the character of God is, surprisingly, “Joy. Abiding in Him - abiding in his full love, I can love another.” So, I ask you, “Have you experienced the character of God? What did that look like?” 

“You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you so that you might go and bear fruit—fruit that will last—and so that whatever you ask in my name the Father will give you. This is my command: Love each other.” John 15:16-17

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cfg5VTyDkyA

They'll Know We Are Christians (We Are One In the Spirit) Lyric Video, Written By Peter Scholtes, 

Re-written and Performed By Jars of Clay. 

Photo by Eva Elijas from Pexels